We have the hardest task ahead...telling Alexander what is happening. We have picked up some books from the therapist at the cancer center that should give us an idea the correct way to do this. If anyone has any suggestions, please send them our way.
I'm interested in the advice the books give you, it feels like it could go a lot of different ways. And it strikes me that there's a balance to everything, a flipside to everything he probably needs to know. For instance:
ReplyDelete- he needs to understand cancer a small bit, especially the way it spreads if you don't remove it
- but he needs not fear that he is in imminent danger of getting it himself
- he needs to understand that the mastectomy, while deeply unfortunate, will protect the rest of your body
- but he needs to not fear that if he gets a "boo boo" on his finger that it'll be removed.
- separate from cancer, he needs to understand a little about surgery in general (anesthetic, recuperation, pain) so he's not surprised.
That stuff makes sense to me and I'm happy give suggestions, but I really don't know! I defer to the books and the therapists and just hope that they can give you the guidance you need in the small amount of time :(
One thing I personally don't think you have to worry about is how much Alexander is going to keep loving through this process, regardless of recuperation, vents, change in your appearance, whatever. He'll keep right on loving.
So...Mike, this the second time that you have commented and I must say...you know your stuff. I agree with what you said here. Aside from all the tech stuff that I know you are a whiz at, I guess you are a knower of all things! Now wonder my cousin married you!
ReplyDeleteAlso, if there are things that I could be doing with this blog that I don't know about, of course you can share them with me....I am a quick learner!
Once you decide how you are going to approach the subject with Alexander, I feel it might be important to share this with anyone who will be in contact with him, so that if he asks, he will always receive a clear message and feels reassured by all.
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